waking up cold: alright I need more blankies
waking up hot: covers thrown everywhere. sweat behind the kneecaps. 3 dead. the pillow is the sun. critical condition.
when boys have sleepovers do they sleep in the same bed like girls do or do the rules of no homo include sharing beds
girls always share beds. and covers and clothes and food and personal space. sometimes even bathrooms
Girls share everything.
this is why it’s so damn hard to tell if a girl is gay or not
So after belle and the beast got married they have to buy all new furniture since like half their castle turned into people
Beauty and the Beast 2: The Trip to Ikea
reblogging your own selfie like
"obama is fuckin up"
"should have voted for the other guy"
No. We should have voted for the other guy you twats. Were all fucking doomed now.
i am laughing because i just started imagining a gordon ramsay-like feminist writer who, rather than helping to keep restaurants in business, goes to writers of television shows and films and chastises them for the sexism, racism, and general lack of diversity in their scripts
"YOUR SCRIPT IS AS WHITE AS THE PAPER IT’S PRINTED ON, YOU DONKEY."
dont flirt with me like this bc i will fall in love with u
your sheep looks concerned
hahaha bro!! of course i am SWAG. homie, i am the DEFINITION of swag.
- aries: can write hella cute poems
- taurus: amazing at putting together ikea furniture
- gemini: best mac and cheese maker around
- cancer: can decorate cakes really good
- leo: photoshop expert
- virgo: can memorize song lyrics in a flash
- libra: great at finding four leaf clovers
- scorpio: super good with makeup
- sagittarius: can take really pretty photos
- capricorn: expert tree climber
- aquarius: awesome at giving speeches
- pisces: can beat any and every video game
They can leap 36 feet
As in leap forward 36 feet
They don’t jump 36 feet into the fucking sky do you know how terrifying that would be the human race wouldn’t have survived because we’d have all had heart attacks while still in Africa
still one of my favorite posts on tumblr